Voice of British Muslim Women

Navida Sayed, London

All I could see was doctors and nurses in blue or green gowns, gloves, masks, eye protection and aprons, I hadn’t seen this in any of my previous hospital admissions. As I lay almost paralysed unable to move my body I gasped for air. I opened my eyes, my heart was racing and pounding as if it was going to jump out of my body, am I about to have a heart attack?

It took me a minute to realize that I was lying in my bed and that it was another night dreaming about repeated news images of hospitals, and reminders that many will die, as there may not be enough ventilators. With a sinking heart and helplessly flowing tears I desperately reached out to Allah reciting,

رَبِّ الۡعٰلَمِیۡنَ

الرَّحۡمٰنِ الرَّحِیۡمِ

مٰلِکِ یَوۡمِ الدِّیۡنِ

اِیَّاکَ نَعۡبُدُ وَ اِیَّاکَ نَسۡتَعِیۡنُ

‘…Lord of all the worlds, The Gracious, the Merciful, Master of the Day of Judgment. Thee alone do we worship and Thee alone do we implore for help’[i] and I offered Tahajjud Prayers begging Allah’s forgiveness and mercy during this pandemic. With underlying medical conditions and weak lungs, I truly believed that God forbid if I contract the virus I will not survive.

As the daily global death toll surged news outlets portrayed a grim picture. Deep down I was petrified and put up a strong front around my family, but continued experiencing nightly panic attacks. I would reach out for my rescue remedy, which is my spiritual heart and soul, the Holy Qur’an, providing instant relief and tranquillity.

The world has never faced such uncertainty and disruption to all aspects of life. Even those of us who generally do not experience anxiety feel anxious, even fearful and negative emotions because what we are witnessing is a reality.  While we can acknowledge and accept that it is OK to experience certain emotions, how we handle and channel the emotions is important.  I remembered a book I read many years ago – ‘Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway’ and I thought what is the worst fear in this pandemic? That we may die, the reality is that we will all depart the world one day no one knows when that time will be and we can only pray,

رَبَّنَاۤ اَفۡرِغۡ عَلَیۡنَا صَبۡرًا وَّ تَوَفَّنَا مُسۡلِمِیۡنَ

‘…Our Lord, pour forth upon us steadfastness and cause us to die resigned unto Thee.’ [7:127][ii]

We pray to be saved from contracting the virus at the same time it is imperative to take all necessary and preventative measures, hand washing, social distancing, for those of us with underlying medical conditions shielding (staying indoors for 12 weeks). After taking all precautionary measures we entrust all our matters to Allah and accept His ultimate will.

While we remain on this earth we can contribute to society to make it a better place and make a difference. We are blessed to belong to the Ahmadiyya Muslim community and there are many ways of assisting others and ourselves during this crisis.

Our dear president of Lajna UK Dr Fariha Khan initiated a project for Lajna to make masks for the community, and scrubs for medical professionals. Allah answered my prayers by blessing me with the opportunity to assist in this creative craft project. It is a well-known fact that ‘engaging with the arts boosts mental well-being’[iii] Engaging in this new activity transformed my negative thoughts and feelings to positive ones, boosting my morale.  Most importantly I snapped out of the fear and anxiety trap. I was able to get back into a routine with all my work. I was reminded how I survived close to death situations and battled previous aliments spiritually and physically with a positive mindset.

Doing something different or new can help us back into old or new routines. Sharing photography, creative crafts, calligraphy and other creative skills can be rewarding, a great project for grandparents and elderly parents is to create a family tree together and spend time together virtually during this fun task.

As we go through the month of Ramadan sleepless nights during this crisis are an opportunity to turn to Allah for Tahajjud Prayer, speak to Him, cry to Him and seek His forgiveness and mercy. Allah will never betray our trust, will always listen and is always there for us. The Holy Qur’an tells us,

‘And when My servants ask thee about Me, say: ‘I am near. I answer the prayer of the supplicant when he prays to Me. So they should hearken to Me and believe in Me, that they may follow the right way.’ (2:187)

During a Friday Sermon His Holiness Mirza Masroor Ahmad reminded us that if we proceed towards Allah, He shall surely proceed towards us. His Holiness reminded us of the Hadith which says that when a man takes one step towards Allah, He takes ten steps, and when he walks towards Allah, He runs towards him.[iv]

May Allah enable us to benefit from the blessings of Ramadan.

[i] https://www.alislam.org/quran/1

[ii] https://www.alislam.org/quran/7:127

[iii] https://www.craftscouncil.org.uk/articles/4-reasons-craft-is-good-for-your-mental-health/

[iv] https://www.alislam.org/mta/summary/may14-2004.html