Voice of British Muslim Women

Arfa Yassir, Swindon

Salvation may be described as the state of balance and harmony of our spiritual being. Since our spiritual beings transcend the boundaries of this life, such harmony is carried to the afterlife, as well.  Islam teaches this state can be achieved, or the process can start at least, in this life.

Spiritual well-being is directly related to our ability to love our Creator and in order to harbour this supreme love, we must first know how to love selflessly. It is through our family and friends that we learn to love and to sacrifice our own happiness for the sake of a loved one. These are the tiny first steps that help us recognise and connect with our Creator.

Home and family play a central role in shaping our lives, from confidence level, flexibility, mutual acceptance, resilience, and reactions to various situations.

Home is the place from where the fabric of society will develop, this is the breeding ground for what forms the society, that is,  individuals. This is the place which sets the ground for the future of an individual, will they contribute positively towards the family and community? Or will they struggle to cope with the tests of life and fall into the darkness of spiritual ailments. There is an entire spectrum between these two limits.

Legislation and policing alone can never completely deal with crime; it is the family unit and home which can pave the way to reform society. Institutions might produce law-abiding individuals for the ‘system’, but they cannot be the basis for love and sacrifice, the rock-solid foundation for community and a guarantee of mental well-being.

My heart bursts for this beautiful, perfect religion Islam, which sets the matter straight from the very basics. Its starts from the sanctity of the institution of marriage, it starts from the emotional, physical and financial well-being of the party, which may be deemed weaker in some situations, i.e., the woman, so the marriage contract gives a heavy load of certain responsibilities to the man.

Islam helps create an environment of peace and love within the family and the community, helping towards the ultimate objective of our life: love of God Almighty.  As a result, not only will family members be at peace with each other but will contribute positively towards the community at large.

Each one of us can play a pivotal role in establishing peace and harmony at home by being just and setting standards of forgiveness, love and compassion. These standards must not be based on personal likes, dislikes or family tradition, but on righteousness.

The spiritual progress of one person creates a ripple effect for the rest of the family. Similarly, without a loving atmosphere at home, any kind of progress is difficult.  Furthermore, we cannot be happy without these beautiful ties and bonds that God Almighty has blessed us with. The family, and the extended family, is not only important, but essential for the spiritual nourishment of any individual. Problems within the family unit can be a serious impediment in this regard.

For an environment of peace and love, there must be equality and fairness. The Holy Qur’an gives us important guidance regarding any contentious issue or disagreement. The principles are clear and can help form a family tradition wherein every member of the family is treated fairly.

“O ye who believe! be strict in observing justice, and be witnesses for the sake of Allah, even though it be against yourselves or against parents and kindred…” [i]

Islam teaches steadfastness and patience in the first instance during trials and tribulations. Within reason, if someone thinks they have not been treated well, they must try and continue to uphold the sanctity of relationships and remember:

“…and to Allah are all affairs referred.” [ii]

At an individual level we can try to be that strong link of the family which holds ties together and promotes mutual respect and love through thick and thin. For it is our family that support us through difficult times and are our happy place during good times. Only love, respect, and compassion must be offered to each other rather than sneers, taunts, aggression or hate.  Because God will not accept anyone with the slightest malice or ill-will in their hearts, we need to constantly purify our hearts.

References:

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[i] Holy Qur’an 4:136 Maulawi Sher Ali Translation

[ii] Holy Qur’an 57:6 Maulawi Sher Ali Translation