Voice of British Muslim Women

*Huzoor is the term Ahmadi Muslims use to refer to His Holiness, the fifth Caliph/Khalifa of the Ahmadiyya Muslim Community*

Sarah Ward, London

I have, like so many others, faced hardships in my life.  There were situations for which I was not prepared and lacked the skills or experience to address.  There are situations I have handled badly and mistakes I have made, many of which I regret.  For some of these mistakes, the impact is still felt by myself and others.

Sometimes, nothing in life can prepare you.  Like having your first baby, you can read all the books you can find on the subject but living through those first weeks as a new mother is a shock to the body and soul.  Everyone scrambles to find their feet as they undertake the steepest learning curve they’ve ever faced.  Second time around it is less of a shock.  What makes all the difference in those trials is the support of people around you.  A friend who can give advice without judgement, a professional who can check and consult when required.  If you are lucky in life, you will find those people and call on them when you are in those black times.

For me, my Khalifa, His Holiness Mirza Masroor Ahmad (may Allah be his Helper) has been just such a source of support.  When I have had difficulties, I have turned to him for support and guidance.  In my personal experience, as a woman, His Holiness has always offered support.  He has guided me, listened without judgement, offered prayers and advice.  He has supported me when I have raised an issue with which I was struggling, and he has ensured other people also reached out to me and given me support when I was in situations of real need.  Huzoor’s support has not only been in words and prayers, he has also given practical support and instructions which have guided me and enabled me to overcome obstacles I faced.  When I hear His Holiness giving speeches about women’s rights, I know that His Holiness has shown his word and deed to be matched on the occasions when I have had a reason to consult him.

I am not going to give specific details, because I regard those matters as private.  They represent some of the times when I have felt at my lowest ebb, I have felt helpless and confused.  His Holiness was my connection with Allah and I always felt consulting him was a way to get advice that I wouldn’t find anywhere else.  I knew before every consultation that I would accept His Holiness’ guidance and sometimes I did ponder over what if the advice did not agree with my views but Alhadmolillah, every time Huzoor gave an answer to me that was more detailed than I expected and more just than I hoped for.

It’s easy to judge hardships from the outside if you are not experiencing them yourself.  It’s easy to say one should do this or that, but the reality is that emotions and relationships are more complex than they appear from a cursory glance.  Life weaves a complex web around us, black and white, good and bad.  Sometimes we need someone to help us navigate our way through the tangle and to move forward and learn.  I have been fortunate enough to have Huzoor to help me move forward, when I had made mistakes myself and not made choices of which I can be proud.  For me, there was healing and strength in the guidance of Huzoor and as I look back on the thread of my life, I feel blessed to have had Huzoor’s support to guide me.