Voice of British Muslim Women

Abgina Sohail, Kingston

To seclude oneself completely from the world and devote oneself to the remembrance of Allah, the Almighty, and the study of the Holy Qur’an at a mosque for ten days straight is something that many Muslims try to do at least once in their life, if not more. This Islamic practice is referred to as ‘i’tikaf’, and it traditionally takes place in the last ten days of Ramadan. And this is exactly what I managed to complete successfully this year.

The holy month of Ramadan brings out so much goodness from everyone’s hearts that Muslims naturally try their utmost to live the best life they can in this very month. Many use this period to strengthen their spiritual selves while keeping up with their fasts every day. This kind of eagerness goes back to the time of the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) who “used to tighten his girdle, keep awake for most of the night for prayers and exhort his family to do the same.” In addition to that, the “Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) used to go into retreat in the mosque during the last ten days and nights of Ramadan.” It’s no wonder that there are so many blessings throughout this month, for its foundations were so blessed.

Given the spiritual blessings of this month, many opt to practice i’tikaf during the last ten days. They cut themselves off from the world for a short while, saying goodbye to electronics and anything that may cause a distraction in the mosque. Sometimes disconnecting from the rest of the world can do wonders in terms of self-help and healing. Moreover, it helps you to connect with Allah even better since you have nothing else to turn to. It’s as if this is a physical reminder that Allah, the Almighty, is the only One Who can help us and He is the only One we should turn to when we need anything. At times, staying at the mosque for a long period can get pretty overwhelming too, because it feels as if you are under the watch of Allah more than ever once you first enter the mosque.

This, for me, was the most rewarding and fulfilling time I have ever spent remembering my Creator and educating myself about Islam. At first, it was definitely nerve-wracking thinking that everyone else engaging in i’tikaf would be much more adept than I was, or that they knew things I didn’t in terms of supplications and Islam in general. However, everyone was so welcoming and helpful instead, and of course, they were there for the same reasons as I was so it felt like intuition telling us all to help one another as well as support each other silently as we prayed together. There were many who kept checking on everyone else to see whether we woke up on time, or how far we had gotten in the Holy Qur’an, as well as making sure everyone was out in time to break our fast.

Our emotional journeys are something we ended up sharing as well. There were many times when I could hear the others crying and praying late at night or early morning after sehri (pre-dawn breakfast) time, which can sometimes lead one to well up with those same feelings inside. Another time, we all felt and shared our happiness as we sat in a group and listened to a few of us discussing Islam, including any questions or concerns any of us had. It became a fun part of the ten day spiritual journey to want to increase my knowledge, to want to get up early with everyone to offer tahajjud (pre-dawn voluntary) Prayers for even more blessings, and to be able to finish the Holy Qur’an before I went home.

One thing I will remember most is the last night we spent at the mosque. During our last tarawih (late night) Prayer, people were feeling so emotional as they cried that it moved me, and I as a person find it hard to cry during any kind of prayer, so I was tempted to force myself to cry along. However, I learned an important thing when I voiced this concern. To cry for show is not what Allah wants, as it is done only for other people to see. It is the sincerity and the fear of not pleasing Him, the love and the attempt to follow Him that Allah wants.

Since I was able to do so much in a mere ten days, I realised that this had always been inside me; the willpower to do everything I did to please Allah. When I came home, I had already decided that I can become an even better person by continuing to act upon what I picked up and learned.
References:

Ramadhan and its Blessings by Sheikh Mubarak Ahmad https://www.alislam.org/library/book/ramadhan-blessings/itikaf/ https://www.alislam.org/library/articles/fasting-fourth-pillar-islam/